Silence is tolerance.

Day 9: So the last few days have been pretty intense with training. Yesterday we had a long day filled with lectures/presentations about service learning, project sequence, and equal employment opportunity. The explanation of service learning was very similar to my understanding of alternative spring break and my understanding of service through education. Our next session was almost 5 hours long, filled with a detailed understanding of the process by which projects are determined and assigned. Although this session was long and dense at times, it provided a lot of information about what I will be doing here (not the specific projects, don’t get too excited).) After this we met with a woman who was employed by the equal opportunity office. We discussed what is considered discrimination and sexual harassment, which was pretty dry but necessary.

Today was a much more riveting as we spent 8 hours discussing various aspects of diversity. I am feeling extremely emotionally drained. We spent a majority of the morning getting to know each other on a pretty basic level. One of the activities/ice breakers we did was based on the effects of different aspects of everyone’s lives on our personalities and personal history. We were told to choose 4 pipe cleaners and put them together however we pleased. We were also told that each pipe cleaner should represent an aspect of who we were (race, ethnicity, religion, education, sexual orientation, etc.) and then discuss what the final shape represented. It was interesting to see what each person chose as the main categories that were the most important or substantial in their lives. Mine were education, sexual orientation, family, and physical/mental ability. We were then asked to take away the pipe cleaner that meant the least. This was very difficult for me because I felt like each other these things was extremely important to who I was and how I defined myself. We also talked about particular categories we wish we could have added after hearing what everyone had to say. To me I wish I had added geographical location and religion because both have had a huge impact in my outlook on life as well.

After this activity we took a break for lunch. When we came back we had the most intense and emotional part of the whole day. Many of the Emersonians reading this will know what I am talking about, but we did an activity called the privilege walk. We were all told to stand in a single line, shoulder to shoulder. We were then read a series of statements followed by a direction of “take a step forward” or “take a step back.” If you were asked to step forward after the statement and you did, it meant that you had had some sort of privilege. If you were told to step back after a statement, it was an example of disadvantage. For example: If your parents took you to see theater or performing arts when you were growing up take a step forward. OR If you were ever required to skip a meal or go hungry because there was not enough money to feed your family take a step back. The questions varied in severity and complexness but they were all distinct. After you took a step you were asked to stay there until the next question, so eventually everyone in the room was spread apart throughout the gymnasium we were in. At the end of the activity some people were in the middle, some very far forward and some very far back.

Every time we are required to do this activity, at the end I feel a strong sense of sadness and anger at the same time, and I’m not really sure why. It may be that I feel guilty for how lucky I am, that I am angry about the systemic structure that is broken in our society, or the sadness that people go through as many struggles as they do. Once we were done with this activity we split into 2 groups of about 40 people each. In these groups we were able to debrief and discuss our reactions to the activity as a whole. It was an inspiring, depressing, and moving discussion hearing about where people have come from. A few people in the group shared that at the end of the activity they never took a step forward during the activity. This was jarring and upsetting to me because I can’t imagine going through the things that many of the people in the same room as me have. Other spoke to assumptions that had been made about them because they were in the upper class or because of the way they looked. There is such a wide spectrum of people here in all topics of diversity.

I feel proud and lucky to be in a place where there are so many people I can learn from. The next 10 months are going to be not only learning about myself but primarily about learning about other people and where they have been and where they are going.

The best part of today, after all the emotional draining stuff, was finding out some important news. After training I was handed an envelope labeled with my name on it by my team leader, who had a pretty serious face on. When I opened the envelope there was a letter from my until leader saying that there had been an alleged incident this weekend and that I should meet him in room 10 at 5:30pm tonight to discuss. I found out that 3 of the other members in my group had received the same letter. We went to room 10 and waited. When Neal, our unit director entered the room he told us the alleged incident was the pack test. He then congratulated us all for passing and handed us another envelope. Inside the envelope was a picture of a firefighter and a message stating “congratulations, please meet in room 2.” We went down to room 2 where there were several other people. We were then congratulated for being chosen as the members of the FIRE TEAM! I was so excited! ☺ I am now an official member of the first ever, Southern Region Fire Team. It was such a funny way to tell us, but was entertaining.

I’m excited to find out which of the 2 fire teams I will be on, but that will have to wait until tomorrow when the whole corps finds out which permanent teams we will be placed on. We will also at this time be told what our projects for round 1 will be! So be excited and patient!!